The Archibald Full Body Trimmer

  • Best-in-class micro-trimming replaceable ceramic blades 
  • Internationally-loved SackSafe guard and a no-nick guarantee
  • Improved guard comb with three different length options
  • A 7,000 RPM motor to handle all thicknesses and textures
  • High-powered LED light for hard-to-reach areas
  • Waterproof ergonomic design with a non-slip grip for risk-free shower trims
  • No-slip wrist strap for a safer trimming experience
  • Full-body-friendly: Strong enough for your balls, made for everywhere
Soap No Background

Beatrix Pemberton’s Exfoliating Bar

Designed for the full-body experience, our Exfoliating Bar boasts the perfect blend of clean soaps and natural scrubby ingredients. Because why settle for anything less than healthy skin and happy hair? And let's not forget the pièce de résistance – our gorgeous, slightly woodsy scent. It's like a forest stroll, minus the leaves in your shoes.


Oliver’s Everywhere Oil

Introducing Oliver’s Everywhere Oil, a versatile, all-natural elixir crafted for the care of most precious bodily hair. It's your go-to solution for the maintenance of your crown jewels, offering enduring anti-chafe goodness for those hardworking bits, bobs and balls, and a nourishing, soothing after-trim treat for hair and follicles.


Are We Best Friends?

Any idiot can build a balls trimmer, but it takes a special type of idiot to call it BALLS™. That’s us, though: our fans love us because we care about their balls so much, we named ourselves after them.

Which BALLS™ Trimmer Works Best for Me?

The Archibald V3 The Classic V2 The Original V1
SackSafe™ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️
Waterproof ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️
Motorpower 🚀 ✈️ 🚂
LED Light ⭐️⭐️ ⭐️
Travel Lock ⭐️
Wrist Strap ⭐️
Colours 💙💜🖤 🖤 🖤

Customer Reviews

Based on 37 reviews

Close trimmed balls :)

Love my balls

I received my first trimmer which must’ve been damaged in transport, it didn’t work properly and was really loud when turned on. I contacted the customer service team, they replied quickly and had another one out in the post which arrived 2 days later. The new one works perfectly, exactly as shown on adverts. It was so good to use I was gutted i run out of hair to shave. The Mrs loves how smooth everywhere is. This product is a must have

Smooth criminal

So I'll begin from the start of my journey which led me to buy the BALLS trimmer. I started my Saturday off like usual, ate my breakfast and headed to the gym at 11:00am.

First exercise on the list was bench press. I laid down on the bench, ready as my gym buddy walked over to spot me. It is when his crotch loomed over my head that I noticed an unfamiliar sparkle coming from his trousers. As I looked over I glared at one of the most beautiful things I had ever seen, beautiful enough to be the eighth wonder of the world. Through the stitching of his trouser were a smooth, clean and shiny pair of BALLS. I went completely nuts as I sprung off the bench and questioned him as to how he acquired such a smooth pair of gems. My buddy just looked at me, put his hand on my shoulder and said "BALLS", I stared at him blankly thinking it was some sort of joke but soon discovered it was in fact the truth.

I rushed home and cracked open my money box which had all the pocket money my mum had given me for the last 10 years. The box had £44.50p! But I needed £45!!!. I looked everywhere, I was busting my nuts trying to find 50p from somewhere. Eventually it came down to an action which I am not proud of to this day, however my BALLS (literally) were on the line, so I sneaked into my local corner shop and opened up the orphans in need charity box and STOLE the 50p. I believe it is one of the most ballsy crimes in the history of crimes. Anyway enough of my criminal past, I now had the £45 to purchase the one and only trimmer.... The BALLS trimmer.

I eagerly logged on to my laptop and searched BALLS in Google. At first I was horrified at the results popping up on my screen, however soon enough I found what I was looking for. I added the trimmer to the sack and typed in all my details. As I clicked the confirmation button a shiver ran down my balls as I realised that I had made one of the greatest purchases in human history. Now it was the dreaded waiting game......

It was Wednesday morning, I got out of bed at 9am and turned the TV on downstairs. My mom walked in to the room and said "Something came in the mail today". It is then that I knew DEEZ NUTS!!! Were finally going to be returned to their former glory as they once were when I was a 5-year-old child.

I rushed to the bathroom and whipped out the trimmer from the packaging. I marveled at the sight of the most amazing piece of technology to be invented, I think I was in love. I slipped down my pants to reveal what seemed to be the amazon rainforest attached to a pair of balls. It was now or never, I grabbed the trimmer and started mowing through the forest of hair (I believe deforestation rose at an alarming rate that day). I couldn't believe it!!! Many razors had tried and failed but this trimmer was effortlessly gliding across the grooves and curves of my bulky ball sack. The hairs were dropping like the balls of teenagers going through puberty. And there it was, my ball sack, shinier than a bald mans head on a bright summers day. The results were outstanding and my balls were screaming for me to write a review for the trimmer. So I grabbed my phone and began writing my review on the BALLS website.

(Think I deserve another free trimmer for my ballsy review)

Better than most

Works better than most. Great bundle overall. The price is great.

Pretty good

Very good overall experience.